I wrote over a month ago about boundaries and testing especially at school and what we were doing about it (see post here). Things have gotten better for the most part, but unfortunately we've been seeing more disrespect coming from our little opinionated small person. If he doesn't like what you have to say he will tell you. Sometimes it's smart and witty and other times it's extremely bratty. Some of the bratty things we've seen border along the lines of how children his age act sometimes and purely a disrespect for people. He will make comments like "I'm four now, I'm not three or one, I don't have to do that." Or he will continue to do something after you have told him not to do it. For instance last night: it was bedtime and he said "I'm going to go get a blanket from the playroom." I said "No, we are going to clean up the clothes on the floor first." He proceeded to walk about of the room dodging my hand in attempt to grab him. He came back in like he got one over me with a smile on his face. I took the blanket and threw it into the hallway. Is he kidding? I explained how deliberately disobeying is never ok and that he will not be getting the blanket at all.
Then there was today. I picked him up from school and I could tell by how the teacher was standing waiting for me that she had a report for me. I always feel like I'm in trouble. Anyway, apparently he was calling other children names (such as potato head, and funny head). They aren't terrible names but the other children didn't like it so the teacher asked him to stop. He ignored her and called someone else a name. He thinks it's funny, and I've been explaining to him that when no one is laughing it's not funny. And when you're calling someone something that isn't their name and they don't think it's funny, then they probably are getting their feelings hurt as well. So the teacher took him aside and told him that he was not going to be able to participate in their motor class (PE). He put his hands on his hips and said "I'm four! I'm older than you, and I don't have to do it!"
At this point I'm feeling defeated and feeling like I'm going to have to really crack down at home and use more tangible punishments because verbal scoldings obviously aren't working. In the car ride home we talked about how that behavior is not ok, and it's not acceptable…ever. He was crying because I really think it upsets him when I'm mad, but this feeling for him has proven to be temporary. We got home and I took extreme measures. I mentioned in the post before that I would take away the whole playroom for a period of time, or a toy here and there. But the fact that he gets it back, I don't know, it seems like he knows that and so it doesn't phase him much anymore. Respect is huge to me. And disrespect is never going to be tolerable even the slightest bit. So as we got ready for nap, I grabbed Rafael (his Ninja turtle figurine) and told him because of his behavior today and his several warnings from before he will have to throw Rafael in the trash. He lost it! It was a pretty dramatic scene here. He was crying, screaming "Momma noooo!" "I don't want to!" I simply said next time maybe you'll think about it before you talk back to your teachers, or anyone else. He cried himself to sleep. I'm here actually feeling bad for him. I know he has to learn, but still it's hard on me too.
